The Six Secrets to Freedom
I dedicate this blog to International Women’s day 2020 #IWD2020 by celebrating all the remarkable females from past to present and feeling ever so hopeful for the future. What better way to pay respect to our fellow females than to share the six secrets to freedom?
This week, to honour the occasion I took the decision to rename my Business Coaching Facebook Group to:
Remarkable Women in Business - I'd love you to join and be a part of the group where I will be giving members an opportunity to shine, share and learn from one another.
It was a tricky decision whether to name iconic figures from previous centuries up until modern day, however choosing only a few to name turned into an impossible task. We all have the women in our lives that we connect with, admire, love and cherish, from a kind Grandma who read bedtime stories to us as a child to Rosa Parks the civil rights activist who refused to surrender her seat to a white passenger on a segregated bus in Alabama.
Whichever International Woman resonates with you, this is your choice and that’s exactly what I am talking about today, your choice, your voice, your freedom.
FREEDOM - the condition or right of being able or allowed to do, say, think etc. whatever you want to, without being controlled or limited
Freedom of speech
Freedom to do what you want
To be allowed freedom of choice
Freedom of thought
Freedom of information
Freedom from injustice or persecution
My freedom is to write this blog, I am not a writer, but I have views, a voice and a massive sense of justice. I've also got myself in all sorts of pickles in the past from NOT following my freedom path. I wanted to hear other women's opinions, so in a recent Facebook post, I asked one of my groups what freedom meant for them. The majority who responded reported great satisfaction with their new found freedom and love of being self-employed, others valued making their own life choices, some viewed freedom as the essence of life and one as an escapism to a happy place in a caravan called freedom!
For me, freedom was defined only four years ago,(nearly to the day) when I started studying my Coaching Course. One of my many ‘light bulb’ moments was undertaking the core values exercise. Now for those of you reading this, who have been coached by ME, you’ll know I have a unique and organic way of understanding your own values. Can you guess what was at the top of my values list? Yes, you’re right, freedom. This is a topic that is close to my heart, is part of my DNA, is respected, understood and nourished. Every day.
Here are my Six Secrets to Freedom
1. Don’t keep freedom a secret
Yes, you heard me correctly, don’t keep it a secret. If you are longing to break free, yearning for independence, craving the confidence to find your voice, aching for a job where you feel valued and given autonomy, hungry for knowledge and desperate to find the courage to change your current reality, then please do not keep it a secret.
Reach out, find someone to share your thoughts with.
Reach out, find and discover your inner passions, desires and dreams of independence.
Reach out, find someone who is living their free life and ask them to mentor and guide you.
Reach out, find a book, an article, a podcast, a film that really speaks to you.
Reach out, find out what you fear more.
“The only real prison is fear, and the only real freedom is freedom from fear”. Aung San Suu Kyi
2. Instead of asking what life can offer you, ask what can YOU offer life?
This is about freedom from limiting beliefs, judgement and fear. It is the encouragement to take a belief, your belief, and challenge it. I want to help you break free from the restrictions of what has been set in your mind, learned behaviours and the anxiety of living a claustrophobic life with a rule book set by others more controlling.
“I can’t run a mile in 4-minutes, everyone says so”
Let me remind you of the 4-minute mile story. Before 1954, the common belief was that man was not physically capable of breaking the 4-minute barrier, It had never been done before. For years, men had attempted to do so and failed. On 6th May 1954, Roger Bannister broke the 4-minute barrier. Since then, over a thousand runners have gone on to run the 4-minute mile.
Take the freedom of choice challenge. If I chose to believe that I can’t (run a 4-min mile) then I will fail. If I chose to believe that I can, then with a plan and practice I am able to offer LIFE the opportunity to follow in my footsteps.
Take a look at last month’s blog, The Six Secrets to Confidence
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.” ― Henry Ford
3. Find your key
One of the ways to let yourself free, is to find the right key to do so. Your key to open the metaphorical door to a different life, a life where you can live in freedom, unlocking new potential, fresh opportunities and change. The key is buried within you, hidden away, but you don’t know how to find it, there is no map, no instructions and no guarantees. You know what you want to be free from, but you can’t seem to take action. The key is concealed, or too big, and the door is too heavy, and you fear the unknown and concerned about judgement from others. Is it a question of better the devil you know? The apprehensive over what you don’t know of what is lying behind the door, versus what you do know. If the latter is not serving you well, it’s time to search for the key.
"I had two options. One was to remain silent and never to speak and then to be killed by the terrorists. The second option was to speak up for my rights and then die. And I chose the second one." -- Malala Yousafzai, Nobel Peace Prize Winner
4. Join forces, find your tribe, unite and fight for your right to…….
When we talk about freedom and independence it doesn’t mean we are going solo, with a ‘screw you all’ attitude, doing things our own way and not considering the bigger picture. We are building strength, resilience and forming alliances with other like-minded people, who have walked the same journey as you.
Freedom from alcohol and the power of AA meetings
Freedom from substance abuse and the power of support groups
Freedom from employment and the power of networking groups
Freedom from boredom and the power of workshops, park runs, learning opportunities that we can all do together.
Freedom from domestic violence and the power of local charities bringing people together, offering backing, refuge and a safe place.
In fact, The Freedom Programme is a domestic violence programme which was created by Pat Craven and evolved from her work with perpetrators of domestic violence
"There is no gate, no lock, no bolt that you can set upon the freedom of my mind."
5. Work out what it is you want to be free from first?
Of course, in the grand scheme of life and the wonderful diversity of personalities, cultures, backgrounds, upbringing and external influences, everyone is unique. You may have a personality type that needs rules, regulations and systems in place to feel comfortable and confident in your life. You may have a personality type who resists the rules and regulations and systems and prefers to break free. Let’s face it, routine serves us all well and helps us get stuff done, but it is a question of finding your happy place.
If the constraints of modern-day living, conformity and boredom starts wearing you down, then it would be beneficial to look at your options. I am often called upon in my coaching business to help with these feelings of confusion, depression and frustration.
It’s the NOT knowing what the feeling is and the WHY
If, in a caravan called Freedom you are given permission to drive you and whoever you decide to invite along, navigating the road of life, following the map to your destiny, to a place of purpose and enrichment, because that’s what you identified is right for you, then what's stopping you?
In the pursuit of happiness, you have found freedom
"[My mother] told me that fear was not an option. I was always told that women are stronger, so I believed it.” -- Diane Von Furstenberg, Fashion Designer
6. Make a plan
Now you know what it is, now you know what path you are truly on, it’s time to make a plan. Focus on what you can control and take responsibility of your life. You are not alone, you can ask for support, get help, advice, guidance and learn how to do things differently.
You have the power to do this, the power to take action, the power as a woman to take the biggest step in your life and that’s the first step.
It’s time to let go of the past, live in the moment and plan for the future.
As Stephen Covey would say in his book The 7 habits of highly effective people, figure out your destination and begin with the end in mind. Focus on the things that really matter to you instead of the trivialities.
Declutter and brain dump all the rubbish from your mind, to clear the path, to see the path, to understand where that path is taking you
If you want to change, but still unsure on how, please get in touch to find out how we can work together to build on living a confident life.
Now it’s all about ME Clare Percival -Life & Business Coach- Trainer & NLP Practitioner -Tribe Boss -Psychologies Magazine Ambassador- Professional people watcher -Podcaster - Blogger
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