Now that’s a random and risque subject to choose for the NY, it doesn’t scream motivational masterclass, but if you read on, all will become clear. Yes, I have added 'Failure' into my 2018 journal already and for a very justifiable reason. Reflection.
After a bumper 2017 which included redundancy, uncertainty, new business, factoring in brokeness, a BIG birthday, a near miss with starring in a reality TV programme (Yes, really the name of which I will keep confidential) and a super proud moment being chosen as Psychologies magazine Ambassador, I ended the year with fail, after fail, after fail with various projects I had in the pipeline and potential contracts turning to dust followed by a massive business let down. Bursts into song ‘what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’.
What does this all equal? No, not a large G&T, although yes, guilty, but taking some time to reflect and evaluate over the holiday period, plus also sticking to my business work/life boundaries and ensuring time off for Christmas and the NY as I am a fully fledged festive junkie.
FAILURE or Fail to Lure? As a coach, I often ask the thought provoking question or TPQ as it’s known in my ME world,
‘what would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?’ go on, ask yourself now. What is it? No don’t tell ME, tell yourself, write it down, pop it on a vision board, text yourself. Shout it from the rooftops. What would you do? Where would you go? Who with? So why blog about failure? Surely, it’s negative, or is it?
FAIL – such a small word for having such big consequences
So, I did the one thing that is my pet hate in any training session and I sure don’t use it when I am training and that is the art of defining the word #dictionarydefinition #hypocrite
By doing so I needed to find a few prime examples that I could perhaps challenge, thanks to Google dictionary!
MEANING - To be unsuccessful in achieving one’s goals
THE CHALLENGE – however at least one had a goal
MEANING- Be unsuccessful in exams or interview
THE CHALLENGE – however one did do the exams and study and one did get the job interview
MEANING - To desert or let down
THE CHALLENGE – however at least one was doing SOMETHING to desert or let down
You may be close to luring, but you are trying, and one lure leads to another lure, here are a few example of my epic fails:
Failure of my first assignment for my teaching/training qualification. I was mortified, but with the constructive feedback and support, it really helped me with the rest of my assignments and made we aware of what to look out for, I was glad I failed.
Failure to keep my job by being made redundant, feelings of not being good enough, even if it was down to budget cuts. I was mortified, but with the power of looking at my options and following my dreams, it ultimately gave me the freedom to start my business, I was glad I failed.
Failure with my previous relationship, the heartbreak, the drama the pain. I was mortified, but with that failure I moved back to the UK and as destiny had planned, I got together with my lifelong friend #22 years later, I was glad I failed.
At this time of year, (must be a trendy Scandinavian name for it, as there is for everything else, lets call it JOGJAN short for ‘Jog on January’), it is the time for goal setting, vision boards, planning, financing and fasting for the ‘very best new year ever, on record, best year of my life, this is the year to do xyz' *screeches to a halt and take an emergency check, one that involves REALITY – come on people
‘way too much pressure’
Yes, I agree to:
Healthy living - Healthy lifestyle - Happiness
Personal goals - Business goals - fitness goals and PB's
Travel -city break - beach holiday
New kitchen - New bathroom - New life
But are we being just a little ambitious? Or punch drunk from the JogJan mantra of
‘must do something this year’
What I would suggest is
Pick one, one is a good start, not nine, we are not setting oneself up to fail, but perhaps expecting a few speed bumps in the journey
Gain support from partners, friends, family or a coach. Tell people your plans, let them see your vision boards (Still spaces available) and ask them to step in when times are challenging
Plan to fail…..WHAT??? Yes schedule in a wobble or two - it is like the equivalent to jumping over a hurdle, when you learn how to jump, then its a piece of cake (oops sorry, inappropriate analogy for anyone dieting at this time of year)
I know as part of JOGJAN I probably have fuzzy brain syndrome, but yes, I really did say ‘Plan to fail’ look I said it again.
A slightly unconventional and topsy-turvy approach to the New Year, but we may as well stare in the face of that big fat elephant in the room marked FAILURE
The stats are stacked against us for NY resolutions - 80 % FAILURE I read today...NOOooooooo
Dropping out of the gym by February
Drinking a sneaky Gin while on dry January
Succumbing to temptation to a delicious slice of GF ginger tiffin cake
Accidently buying a ridiculously discounted coat in the sale (preloved is allowed)
Frying up a slice of bacon even though you have agreed to adopt a Vegan January challenge
Why don’t you give yourself a ‘get out of jail free’ card, for when and if the lure tempts you. You have permission to be human, not a robot, but its all about getting back on the horse, rather than falling into a pit of self-loathing and destruction, and yes, I am talking from experience!
Research now suggests that forming a new habit takes from 66-100 days, so we are talking about Easter time, this is long haul, not a short haul flight and turbulence may be experienced along the way.
If we plan for failure, or if the lure starts luring, when it presents its tempting head then we can be prepared and can adopt the voice of reason, not insanity. Here’s the plan, it’s free
‘Success is stumbling from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm’ Winston Churchill
‘It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed’ Theodore Roosevelt
‘I often fear failure, but I fear inactivity more’ Clare P
SPACES STILL AVAILABLE ON THE LAST VISION BOARD WORKSHOP
OR HOST YOUR OWN OR BOOK A ONE TO ONE SESSION
I will be running the Vision Board Life Token session on the following date:
19th January 2018 10.30- 13.30
**New Price ** Cost: £40pp inc Board reduced from £50, including materials and refreshments
Venue: Studio 36 – Clarence Walk, Reigate, Surrey
This 3-hour session will cover:
How a vision board works
Letting go of what maybe clouding your visions
The ‘Wheel of life’ to guide you to ideas and dreams
Positive language and techniques to making it happen
The cost of the board, materials, colour pens and glue etc
Oh and of course, you get ME, a tried and tested Vision Board junkie, with super powers, who can absolutely validate the magical properties of the board! Here are some testimonials for you:
Testimonials on recent vision board workshops
'The ambience, setting and materials were fantastic'
'It was great to set a time aside to sit and think about what I wanted to achieve in 2018 and to be guided through the visions'
'It really helped focus my mind'
The start of 2018 brings the start of the Life Leap Club and as a Psychologies Ambassador I am busy planning a FREE community Life Leap Club locally in Reigate/Redhill for up to 10 people (initially)who would like to meet on a regular monthly basis and discuss issues and topics from the magazine plus gain insights from the support of your Ambassador - think of it like the ultimate Book Club -
Dates, venue and further information will be revealed soon - however if you are interested in becoming one of the Life Leap group, please get in touch firstname.lastname@example.org
De-cluttering for the New Year - would you love a neat and tidy bedroom and wardrobes that were full of clothes you wear, capsule outfits, colour coordinated and tidy - no you are not dreaming, this is possible - a reality! Email email@example.com to arrange a FREE telephone consultation
Preloved Clothing Surrey will start on Wednesday 31st January at The White Lion, Redhill with many SALE preloved items - more news next week
As we think about the year ahead and reflect upon the year that has passed, think about the things that put a big smile on your face and do more of that!
Lots of love